i am currently sleep deprived, cold, and in need of studying for test number two. i decided to stay up late last night to study for test number one. but to no avail that didn't suffice. i don't know why i feel as though i can study late at night. it's fine if i already know the material, but i didn't. needless to say after that first exam i feel dumber than a box of rocks. it's my own fault, so i can't be bitter. man i really need to get my shit together.
i had the best day yesterday with my son. he is so wonderful on so many levels. he can still be a pain in the ass, but man is he awesome. i love his little face and his little hands. i love the way he smells and the sounds he makes when he tries to talk. i love washing his clothes because they smell so great coming out of the dryer, and i love that when he is in bed i can hug his clothes. he has been such a firecracker and has stressed me out to no end. but i wouldn't change it for the world. no one can ever truly emulate how great you feel and how much wholeness and joy seeing your child brings to your life. knowing that he's completely innocent and relies on you for everything. i love giving him hugs, i love the way he looks at the world with utter astonishment with those chubby little cheeks. i love rocking him to sleep at night, and i love that he can finally hold his own bottle. i love being able to grow with him and i love the fact that i can teach him how to be such a wonderful person. i love... him
well i started my post in a bitch fest, but that last paragraph has turned my day around already. now i'm going to take my iced coffee and bad complexion and start cramming for test number two. hopefully i won't be a complete idiot during the next test like i was for the first.
wish me luck.
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